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A majority of parents with young children do not have the work or childcare arrangements that they want, with their biggest concern being the lack of quality time with their children, according to a new report published by the New Practice Lab at New America.
This mismatch between families’ current realities and ideal scenarios begins early — as soon as their children are born, when the parental leave they are able to take is often less time than they want.
It may not be altogether surprising that parents in the United States are not satisfied with their leave, care and work options. After all, it is one of the only developed nations that lacks a national paid-leave program for new parents, and childcare in this country is unaffordable and inaccessible to many families.
Still, these findings add an important dimension to the conversation about raising children in America: The survey is nationally representative and the largest-of-its-kind, reaching about 5,500 parents and primary caregivers with children from birth to age 5, including nearly 3,000 parents with household income below 200% of the federal poverty level or about $66,000 or less for a family of four.
But it’s more than that, said Alyson Silkowski, senior policy adviser at the New Practice Lab, a team focused on improving economic outcomes for American families with young children, and one of the authors of the report.
“There’s a lot we know about what’s not working,” Silkowski said of earlier data and surveys on families. “We were keen to add to this conversation about parenthood in America — what it is parents actually want as they think about these early years.”
The simplest answer to what parents want, they found, is more time and more money.
Nearly three in four parents said they want more quality time with their children, such as playing, being outside and traveling. Instead, they feel much of their “free” time is spent doing housework such as cooking and cleaning. These findings hold across income levels, geography, race and ethnicity.
Based on responses from 2,894 parents who were employed and returned to work when their youngest child was born. Parents were asked to share how much time they took off, irrespective of whether it was paid or unpaid leave. (New America)
More than half of parents — 55% — said they wanted more time off with their child after they were born, and that’s true for both moms and dads.
“Neither are getting what they want,” Silkowski noted.
Priscilla Welsh, a mom of two living in a suburb of Denver, lost her job while pregnant with her first child a few years ago after the company that employed her went out of business. When their son was born, Welsh was not working, and her husband, who is self-employed, “took a pause” from work to be at home with his family, she shared.
“It was a rougher period of very tight finances with our firstborn,” she said. “You want to snuggle your newborn and feel relaxed, but it was top of mind for me — how little money we had.”
When Welsh had their second child, in 2025, her husband was able to take advantage of Colorado’s state paid parental leave program, which was approved by voters in 2020 and became available to families in early 2024. He was able to take 12 weeks of paid leave to be at home with his wife, toddler and newborn son, which Welsh described as “amazing.”
As for money, the New Practice Lab found that financial concerns seem to be leading families to choose work and childcare arrangements that do not reflect their preferences.
Nearly nine in 10 parents said they want to work some amount, including 91% of dads and 85% of moms, but 75% said their current work arrangement is not one they want.
Welsh has not returned to the workforce since she lost her job during her first pregnancy, but she would like to if she can find the right position, she said. Ideally, she’d work one day a week in an event-planning role. She loves the challenge-and-reward cycle of paid work, and she also thinks it would be good for her as a parent.
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“I want to miss them,” she said of her sons, who are 2.5 years and 10 months old. “[Working] would help me miss them and be a better mom when I’m around them.”
She added: ““Being a mom is just one challenge after another after another. But there’s no big reward. It’s like, ‘Potty training is over!’ But no, potty training is never over.”
In her paid jobs of the past, Welsh would work really hard to complete a task or a project, then get appreciation and acknowledgement for it, she said — “rather than being a parent, where you’re never finished.” She thinks that returning to the labor force would “stretch” her in a good way.
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The main reason she isn’t working now is because she isn’t looking — because she doesn’t think that what she is seeking is even out there.
“Part of me just doesn’t believe it exists, or that I’d be paid high enough that it would be worth my time,” she said.
Many moms — and some dads — with young children seem to share Welsh’s desire for more flexible, part-time work.
Of the parents who said they prefer to work, 30% of moms and 64% of dads said they want to work full-time, compared to 28% of moms and 15% of dads who want flexible work and 25% of moms and 12% of dads who want part-time work.
Parents who selected “prefer not to work” are not shown. (New America)
About a third of respondents said they preferred to care for their children themselves in their ideal scenario, while 19% wanted a combination of care, 18% wanted another parent to do the caregiving, 15% wanted formal settings, 11% wanted a relative or friend, and 5% wanted a nanny or sitter.
“There wasn’t a single solution that crossed the 50% threshold,” noted Amira Choueiki Boland, chief of staff at the New Practice Lab and an author of the report.
Based on responses from 4,271 parents whose current child care arrangement does not fully match their ideal arrangements. Parents were asked to select all options that apply. (New America)
Boland also acknowledged that many families seem to have modest expectations for what can change about their circumstances — whether it’s more parental leave or more satisfying work and childcare arrangements.
“We’re conditioned to what we think is possible,” Boland said, recalling how “astounded” she was to observe the system of support in place for colleagues who took parental leave when she worked in Canada. “[We should be] opening up our aperture to what other societies have figured out to make this work better.”
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