No one disputes that parents and caregivers today are juggling many responsibilities. And screens are so easy to turn to, always right there in a parent’s pocket, with an engrossing video just a few taps away.
In interviews, researchers and early educators alike urged parents to find alternatives. Even if the result is less screen time, rather than none, that’s a win, they said.
The use of digital tools to distract children when they’re bored or to calm them down when they’re upset is denying them an opportunity to build essential life skills, said Dr. Carol Wilkinson, an assistant professor of pediatrics at Harvard Medical School who was involved in a study about the effects of screen time during infancy.
“A lot of the skills kids need … come out of the practice of kids being frustrated,” Wilkinson said, noting the way many parents will pull out a device when a child is throwing a tantrum. “Unfortunately, it’s something parents don’t always know how to handle or have time and space to support. We now have this thing that is easy and available that somehow seems to miraculously work every time. In many ways, it’s a missed opportunity for kids practicing things like behavioral regulation.”
Perry, of Children and Screens, made a similar point: “That very phenomenon of learning to be calm and learning to distract yourself are such foundational pieces of our development that parents choosing a screen for that reason are postponing or even delaying their ability to do that.”
Wilkinson also wondered if maybe young parents today have forgotten how to play — or at least have lost sight of the magic of play.
“If parents don’t know the value of a giggle, the value of peek-a-boo, the value of singing, the value of raspberries — if they don’t know that’s going to grow their child’s brain more than Bluey does,” Wilkinson said, then they may not realize what they’re missing out on when they hand their child a phone or tablet or place them in front of a TV.
Robyn Zapien, director of Livermore Playschool in Livermore, California, said she doesn’t want to shame families who use screens with their young children at home, but she knows enough not to use them in her early learning program.
“Young children under 5 years old really need the interaction of their parents, siblings, friends and peers. They don’t need the interaction of something digital on a screen,” Zapien shared. “They need to know how to make real connections, how to express real feelings, and what it’s like in the real world — not just the virtual world they’re watching.”
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